I want every character in #FastX to have an Apple Watch that keeps going off with crash detection just so I can see Vin Diesel get cranky at it and break the Watch band by flexing #AppleEvent

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God I hope the Apple Watch Ultra is priced at some ridiculous amount so I stop wanting it, which is basically only due to the orange side button

Also “Apple Watch Ultra” is a terrible name #AppleEvent

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$799 was not what I was thinking when I said “ridiculous amount”, dammit #AppleEvent

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They could just look directly at the camera and go “Hey eD! you know you’re buying these AirPods Pro right?” and move on and they’d be right #AppleEvent

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I’m hoping the more muted iPhone Pro-style colors on the regular iPhone means I’m gonna get some ridiculous bold colors on my iPhone Pro this year, please and thank you! #AppleEvent

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Alright Deep Purple isn’t as deep as I wanted but I’ll still take it #AppleEvent

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Yeah I bought the Ultra shut up #AppleEvent