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Life, Y'Know? Linkin' Log News Politics Science

‘These new vaccine mutants are extremely disappointing,’ by Magneto

From Alexandra Petri at the Washington Post:

Sherri Tenpenny, an osteopath, testified in Ohio that, “I’m sure you’ve seen the pictures all over the Internet of people who have had these shots and now they’re magnetized. They can put a key on their forehead. It sticks. They can put spoons and forks all over them and they can stick.” When I heard this, I was more excited than I have been in years. People who could control metal! Magnetic people! I felt full of hope for mutantkind. These new mutants were appearing in state legislature after state legislature, testifying to the development of these new powers, and I said to myself, “Finally everything is coming up Magneto!” I was so excited. […]

[L]et me tell you, I was pretty let down.

I spent more time cackling while reading this than I care to admit.

Categories
Entertainment

New “Fast & Furious 9” Trailer: Just Take My Money Already

Come for the ridiculous magnet stunts, stay for Helen Mirren in a car chase.

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Uncategorized

More Like “Excellently Drawn Pet” TBH

The fine folks at the Animal Rescue League of Iowa recently did a Poorly Drawn Pet fundraiser — if you donated to them, and sent them a picture of your pet, one of their volunteers would draw your pet for you, which is a brilliant idea tbh.

I donated about 30 seconds after I heard about this, and let me tell you, the results were everything I could have possibly hoped for:

A drawing of my golden retriever, Sunshine, with the caption "A Happy Dog", which is so spot-on that it melts my face.
“A Happy Dog” is right, good work anonymous artist!

While the Poorly Drawn Pets fundraiser is over, you can still donate to the Animal Rescue League of Iowa here. You know you want to, just do it.

Categories
Linkin' Log Technology

Un-Un-Carrier

T-Mobile is going to start sharing some customer information with third-party advertisers unless their customers opt-out, which is so cool and not absolutely jackasstastic at all:

T-Mobile will soon put a new privacy policy into effect that will allow it to share certain kinds of customer information with third-party advertisers. Starting on April 26th, 2021, all customers will be automatically opted in to the new program, as spotted by The Wall Street Journal. Customers who don’t want to participate will need to manually opt out using their accounts’ privacy tools.

For a carrier that built up their business shouting about how they weren’t like those other cellular providers, this is a pretty standard-issue-carrier-horseshit move.

Categories
Technology

iOS and iPadOS 14: The MacStories Review

Federico Vittici’s annual small-book-length iOS and iPadOS review is now out — I haven’t read it yet, but it’s so good each year that I’m just going to link you to it anyway.

Categories
Entertainment

The Hamilton Polka

About five minutes after I started watching “Hamilton” on Disney Plus, I started wondering how long it’d take Weird Al to get a music video together for “The Hamilton Polka”.

Turns out the answer was two days, and it was worth every second of the wait.

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Life, Y'Know? Linkin' Log Society

Black Lives Matter.

If you’re as frustrated at everything that’s going on and looking for a way to help, there’s an excellent list of resources here.

Also, for the record, if you’re thinking of contacting me to argue about this, or just be a shitface in general, you can figure out where the unfollow button is on your own.

Categories
Entertainment

Actor’s Fund: You Can’t Stop the Beat

Come for the 4:45 seconds of awesomeness that will get your mind off some of the nightmare that is everyday life, stay for Martin Short wearing a “Straight Outta Quarantine” shirt.

Categories
Technology

Apple Announces iPad Pro Updates

Apple announced a new version of the iPad Pro today, and, folks, spare a thought for my bank account, ’cause I wants it.

In the way of actual updates, it’s more or less what we’d all expect — a faster A12Z Bionic processor, WiFi 6 networking, which (with the right router) can allow download speeds of 1.2 Gbps (up from 866Mbps), and support for 30 different LTE cellular networking bands, up from 29.

That one band will make all the difference, I’m sure!1Full disclosure: I am not sure.

Apple also announced mouse and trackpad support will come with iPadOS 13.4, which will be released on March 24th — that’s the one thing Jeff has been asking me about for months, so he’ll be extremely happy with that.

Finally, Apple announced a new Magic Keyboard, which won’t be out until May, which sucks ’cause I want it now, dammit!

Would’ja look at that thing?!

It has a trackpad, backlit keys (that use the scissor switches that Apple has mercifully gone back to on the 16″ MacBook Pro and new MacBook Air, also announced today), a USB-C port with passthrough power for your iPad, and viewing angles that I cannot wait to try, just take my money Tim Apple.

There’s a bunch more details about the new iPad Pro on MacStories. Give it a read, but hide your Apple Card while you do.

Categories
Linkin' Log News Politics

Katie Porter’s Whiteboard

When you woke up this morning and put on your bland suit in preparation for your hearing, I bet you looked yourself in the mirror and thought: Today’s the day. Katie Porter’s not going to get me.

Well, I’m Representative Katie Porter’s whiteboard, and I’ve got a message scrawled upon my glistening façade: We’re about to kick your ass.

The exchange between Rep. Katie Porter of California and an official from the CDC during a hearing yesterday was awesome. This monologue from McSweeney’s Internet Tendency is an equally-awesome companion piece.

If you haven’t seen Rep. Porter mopping the floor with the officials from the CDC yet, you should 100% watch the video below before you read the piece on McSweeney’s. It’s worth your time, I promise.