eD! Thomas

eD! Thomas

Excels Equally in Awesomeness & Modesty

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  • A Stolen NSA Tool Being Used by Cybercriminals. Whoopsie.

    May 30, 2019

    Well this is awkward:

    For nearly three weeks, Baltimore has struggled with a cyberattack by digital extortionists that has frozen thousands of computers, shut down email and disrupted real estate sales, water bills, health alerts and many other services.

    But here is what frustrated city employees and residents do not know: A key component of the malware that cybercriminals used in the attack was developed at taxpayer expense a short drive down the Baltimore-Washington Parkway at the National Security Agency, according to security experts briefed on the case.

    This is obviously an isolated incident and definitely shouldn’t be used as evidence that maybe giving the FBI a back-door through encryption could be a bad idea.

  • Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Trailer

    April 12, 2019

    Honestly the only reason I’m not demanding it be December right now is because that would mean I’m skipping Avengers: Endgame, but that’s it.

  • Party Rock Anthem but Uptown Girl

    April 8, 2019

    I just remembered that this exists, and I wanted you to know about it, too.

  • The only problem I’ve had with my car is that it didn’t ask people to say hi to their dogs for me.

    March 23, 2019
    The back of my car, with a “tell your dog I said hi” sticker
    That problem is now resolved.
  • Jeff Bezos: No Thank You, Mr. Pecker.

    February 7, 2019

    Amazon.com founder and Washington Post owner Jeff Bezos was investigating how The National Enquirer got ahold of the steamy text messages he sent to his mistress. The National Enquirer, you might imagine, wasn’t keen on that:

    Something unusual happened to me yesterday. Actually, for me it wasn’t just unusual — it was a first. I was made an offer I couldn’t refuse. Or at least that’s what the top people at the National Enquirer thought. I’m glad they thought that, because it emboldened them to put it all in writing. Rather than capitulate to extortion and blackmail, I’ve decided to publish exactly what they sent me, despite the personal cost and embarrassment they threaten.

    Good on Bezos for standing up to these buckets of slime posing as humans at The National Enquirer, but woe be unto us, the rest of humanity, as the likelihood that we’re going to see Bezos’s Bits has increased 700%.


  • Ya Damn Right

    February 7, 2019

    In 11th grade, we had to make a video based on a poem for my A.P. English class. At the request of my teacher, I did two — the one she wanted was a overly-serious (and totally misunderstanding of the point of the poem) video for Robert Frost’s “The Road Less Traveled”, and the one I wanted to do was a reading of the Shaft theme.

    This is all to say that I can’t wait for this movie, and I will 100% be there several times opening weekend.

  • Avengers: Endgame Trailer #1

    December 7, 2018
    It’s cool if we can rush ahead to April 2019 now, I’m fine with that.

    I love this trailer, but I hate the title, which is Marvel’s own damn fault — don’t keep the name of the movie a secret and overhype it if you’re just going to go with what everyone’s first guess was, you ninnies.

    In fact, here’s a few titles I would have liked them to go with instead:

    1. Avengers: Assemble
    2. Avengers: Captain Marvel’s Gonna Be Pissed
    3. Avengers: Good of You to Finally Show Up, Hawkeye Ronin
    4. Avengers: Probably the Last One Before the X-Men Start Ruining Things, Ugh
    5. Avengers v Thanos: Dawn of Justice
  • Took 5 hours for Sunshine to rip this toy to shreds, which is an impressive display of longevity for a toy around here, honestly.

    November 21, 2018
    Took 5 hours for Sunshine to rip this toy to shreds, which is an impressive display of longevity for a toy around here, honestly.
  • Sizzler Promotional Video

    November 15, 2018

    This is easily the most 1990s thing I’ve seen in a long time and I might love it.

    Also, Sizzler’s Italian Bar was what’s up, and I miss it terribly.

  • Mat Honan’s Review of the Google Pixel 3 is Very Good

    November 11, 2018

    We are captives to our phones, they are having a deleterious effect on society, and no one is coming to help us. On the upside, this is a great phone.

    It’s a month old, so you probably already read this but, if you hadn’t, it’s worth a look.

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