My Dumb Broken Brain

If you’re not familiar with the online reporting of Ashley Feinberg, (1) go follow her on Twitter right now, and (2) you should also subscribe to Trashberg, her new newsletter.

In the latest installment of Trashberg, Feinberg goes into a deep-dive into the Instagram shenanigans of Cally Gingrich, wife of former Speaker of the House and current Burlap Sack of Instant Mashed Potatoes Posing as a Human, Newt Gingrich.

In this analysis, Feinberg describes “The Cally”, the Gingrichii’s signature pose:

This is not something Cally dreamed up recently. According to my research, she began perfecting this shot as early as 2014. And when viewed within the larger context of her Instagram, the reappearance of this particular arrangement is easy to overlook. Each one is separated by shots of the Pope, Newt’s dinner, all the things Cally holds dear. But take notice of the repetition just once, and The Cally quickly become all you can see. Your dreams become an endless scroll of plastered smiles on smooth Callies and sweaty-faced Newts, boring into your innermost self as you pray for relief.

But, please, don’t take my word for it. Observe.

Readers are then treated to a number of examples of The Cally in action, and, then, a GIF combining all The Cally images. And, watching that GIF, my brain — my dumb, stupid brain — could only think of one thing.